Meet Our Experts


 
 

Dr. Jess

Astroglide's Resident Sexologist

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Dr. Jess

With a background in sex education training programs, sexual diversity and equity, Dr. Jess O’Reilly (PhD) has become the go-to sexpert. Our resident sexologist shares valuable health and relationship advice as the host of Playboy TV’s SWING, through public speaking events like TEDx Talks and in her best-selling books including The New Sex Bible: The New Guide to Sexual Love.
To learn more, visit sexwithdrjess.com and check the Astroglide blog monthly for her exclusive features.


 

Dr. Drai

Astroglide's Sexual Health Advisor

Read Bio

 
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Dr. Drai

Dr. Draion M. Burch, DO (Dr. Drai) is an Official Sexual Health and Wellness Advisor for Astroglide. A board-certified Obstetrician and Gynecologist, Dr. Drai has been called “America’s OBGYN.” When he’s not attending to his growing list of celebrity patients across the country, Dr. Drai is writing, speaking, and consulting about sexual wellness and serving as a media expert on transgender health issues. Learn more about Dr. Drai by checking out his blogs here or by visiting his site: www.drdrai.com.


 

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Expert Advice

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    Dr. Jess's Tips

  • The Pocket +

    The Pocket

    One of the most versatile finger and tongue tricks designed to make her toes curl as you stroke the legs and bulbs of her clitoris. 

    • Start by lying at her side at hip height. 
    • Put a few drops of lube on all five fingers and place your palm flat against her Venus Mound. 
    • Bend your fingers down to press against the full width and length of her vulva so that you’re cupping it in your hand.
    • Slowly slide your fingers up and down increasing your speed as her arousal builds.

  • Cross My Fingers +

    Cross My Fingers

    The perfect technique to get her all riled up by stimulating her orgasmic platform, which includes the opening and outer third of her vagina.

    • Cross your index and middle fingers and slather them in lube.
    • Insert your crossed fingers with your palm facing down and rotate as you slide in and out.
    • Use her hip movements and breath rate as cues to find the perfect rhythm. 

     

  • The Sensual W +

    The Sensual W

    A simple warm-up move will get her juices flowing and increase blood flow to her hot spots. Since you’ll be stimulating her clitoris as you stroke, don’t be surprised if your sexy warm-up quickly turns into some full-fledged hip thrusting and deep moaning on her part.

    • Apply a generous amount of lube to one hand.
    • Place your wet palm against her vulva and form a W with all five fingers (keeping your thumb together with your index finger and your pinky together with your ring finger). 
    • Slowly slide “The W” downward as your squeeze your fingers together. Your middle finger can press down against her clitoris while the outer edges of the “W” gently squeeze her inner labia. 
    • Slide back up over her vulva and re-open your fingers to re-form the “W” as you approach the top again. 

     

    If you find that your “W” looks more like the letter “V” or a greeting from a popular space exploration show, fear not. She won’t know the difference! There is no right or wrong way to use these techniques — experiment, make changes and feel to rename them as you see fit.

     

  • The Cross My Heart +

    The Cross My Heart

    The technique can promote circulation, encourage lubrication and improve sexual response. But who cares about the health benefits, when it feels so darn good?

    • Press both thumbs (covered in lube) against the head of her clitoris at the top of her vulva.
    • Slowly trace your thumbs in a heart-shape around her vulva paying extra attention to the sensitive fourchette (the notch where her lips connect at the bottom).
    • When you reach the bottom, bring both thumbs back up the center to reach the top and repeat.

     

  • The Nose Job +

    The Nose Job

    Designed with both pleasure and intimacy in mind. Not only does the tip of your nose have a unique texture (go ahead and touch it very gently with your index finger), but the nose is an erogenous zone for many people. In fact, its inner lining can swell during sexual arousal just like the genitals and breasts. 

    • Put a drop or two of lube on the tip of your nose and gently run it between her lips.
    • Press it gently against the head of her clitoris or nod you head back and forth as you breathe deeply.
    • Use your hands to open up her labia and slide your lubed-up nose right inside of her as you tell her just how much you love it!

     

  • Two Tongues +

    Two Tongues

    Your lips and tongue can work wonders in the bedroom, but you have ten titillating fingers that can do so much more with the right amount of pressure and lube! Not only are your fingers more agile than your tongue, but they can be used to weave a sexy fantasy and reignite the spark:

    • Warm up your hands and place a few drops of lube to your fingertips.
    • Use your index and middle finger to “lick” all around his shaft alternating slow winding motions with quick short lines. 
    • Add another hand (index and middle finger or one big flat palm) to simulate two tongues.
    • As you “lick” away with your hands, tell him how good it feels and ask him if he’d like to have two lovers licking him into a frenzy.

    Playing with fantasies about threesomes or group sex can be unbelievable hot! This is a top sex fantasy for both men and women and many monogamous couples talk about these scenarios with no intention of living them out. However, it is important to talk to your partner about boundaries beforehand to make sure they’re comfortable with this type of erotic talk. Debriefing and offering reassurance (e.g. “In real life, you’re all I want! It’s just fun to fantasize and talk about threesomes”) is also essential to a happy relationship and sex life. 

    On the other hand, if you’re up for acting out threesomes and group sex, that’s perfectly okay too! You will, however, need to put considerable time and energy into preparing for your first experience to ensure that it is safe and pleasurable. 

  • The Firestarter +

    The Firestarter

    The perfect move to warm him up and give him a taste of what’s to come.

    • Cover your hands in lube and rub them together to create some heat.
    • Gently roll his shaft between your hands as though you’re warming him between your palms. 
    • Lick your lips and breathe warm air over his head to tease him into a frenzy.

     

  • The Goddess +

    The Goddess

    Thanks to the magic and special effects of porn, deep throating has been elevated to a level of fame and reverence beyond its true merits. Though deep pressure, suction and stroking are certainly desirable, they’re not the end-all be-all of a good blowjob. After all, your hands not only offer a tighter grip and greater flexibility, but with the right amount of lube and perfected technique, they should feel wetter and better than your mouth alone.

    • Warm your hands up in advance so that they reach a temperature similar to that of your mouth.
    • Interlace your fingers as you clasp both hands together and slather them in lube.
    • Attach your interlaced hands to your mouth so that they become one fluid unit.
    • Breathe heavily so that it feels as though you’re approaching him with your warm, wet mouth and slide your hands and mouth over his penis in one felt swoop. 
    • Lower your hands all the way to his base and then tighten your grip as you suck right back up to the top.
    • Stroke and suck up and down with your hands and mouth as one long, wet tunnel squeezing a little tighter each time you reach the very base.

  • The Stranger +

    The Stranger

    It is perfectly natural to be attracted to people other than your partner and fantasies are a natural extension of this attraction. The Stranger lets you play with new sensations to mimic the feeling of being touched by a brand new set of hands.

    • Get your hand nice and slippery with lube.
    • Use a backhand grip beginning in a thumbs-down position to grasp the base of his penis with all five fingers.
    • Stroke upward until your thumb and index finger reach the ridge and then lower all the way back down to the base.

     

  • The Like a Prayer +

    The Like a Prayer

    This will have him singing your praises for years to come!

    • Rub some lube between your palms to warm them up and place your hands in prayer position.
    • Once he’s hard, lower your hands over his cock beginning with the base of your palms and keeping your finger tips pointing upward toward his head.
    • Once you reach the base, open up your index and middle fingers before returning the tip and returning your hands back to prayer position.
    • Apply firm pressure as you stroke your hands up and down in prayer position.

    Dr. Drai's Tips

  • How can I protect myself against STIs? +

    How can I protect myself against STIs?

    When having sex -- and that includes oral and other types of sex -- you must protect yourself. There are nine types of STIs that we can test for in the office. Genital cultures can be done to look for Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, and Trichomonas. Blood tests can be done to test for Syphilis, Hepatitis B, Hepatitis C, and HIV. We prefer to test for HSV when there's a sore. HPV can only be tested for when you get a Pap smear.

    You have to use condoms during all types of sex. Latex is preferred to prevent the transmission of STIs. You can spice up oral sex by using flavored condoms (and still be safe!). When you are performing cunnilingus, use dental dams. Dental dams should also be used when you are performing analingus. Even when you’re using your hands, you can use latex gloves!

    If you’re using the proper protection, your risk of catching an STI should be next to nothing. If you are concerned about the possibility that you might’ve contracted an STI, visit your doctor ASAP! (As an FYI, you can have even safer sex by making him keep his undies on!)

  • How often should you visit your gynecologist? +

    How often should you visit your gynecologist?

    You need to see your gynecologist yearly. The purpose of your yearly exam is to screen for breast cancer (by checking your breasts), cervical cancer (by doing a Pap smear), and STIs, but most importantly to make sure you are comfortable with your changing body.

    Your gynecologist will do a pelvic exam to look at your internal and external genitalia making sure they are normal and healthy. Your gynecologist will also do a bimanual exam -- here, we use our fingers to feel your uterus, ovaries, cervix to make sure you have no pain and to make sure these organs feel normal. Your gynecologist will start checking your breasts at age 21. Let me clear up a few things: as you know, Pap smear guidelines have changed. You get your first one at 21 years old. Women ages 21-29 get a Pap smear once every 3 years.

    You will need it yearly if it is abnormal and you test positive for HPV. Ladies over age 30 get a Pap smear and HPV testing every 5 years as long as both are negative. Women over 65 years old do not need PAP smears anymore if they have tested negative three times within the last 10 years. Also, women with total hysterectomies don’t need Pap smears, as they no longer have a cervix. Even though you may not necessarily get a Pap smear yearly, you still need to visit your gynecologist.

  • What causes pain during intercourse? +

    What causes pain during intercourse?

    Painful sex (or dyspareunia) can occur if you have an infection, inflammation, or skin disorder (such as eczema), injury to your internal and external genitalia, a dry vagina, or vaginismus (uncontrollable spasms of the vagina). It can also happen if you have endometriosis, uterine fibroids, bladder infections, or ovarian cysts.

    Scarring from surgeries down there can also make sex painful. Women who are depressed, anxious, stressed out, or have been sexually abused, or who are in a bad relationship can also have this problem. There isn't quick fix for this issue ladies. You need to see a doctor. As a note, a dry vagina can be caused from fighting with your partner, being in menopause, breastfeeding, and taking certain medications like birth control pills -- lube can help with this.

    Fellas -- sex can be also be painful for you if you have an infection, have a curved penis when erect, retraction problems with your turtleneck (foreskin) if you have it, or a chapped shaft (use lube!).

  • When should you skip your gynecologist visit and head to the ER? +

    When should you skip your gynecologist visit and head to the ER?

    If you are having vaginal bleeding that is accompanied by dizziness, shortness of breath, or an accelerated heart rate, get to the ER ASAP! If you are having belly pain or pelvic pain not relieved by Tylenol or Motrin, you also need to go. Same goes for those killer headaches! If you have an allergic reaction, don't hesitate -- go! One thing you shouldn’t go to the ER for? A pregnancy test -- that’s a pet peeve of mine. Go to the dollar store and buy a test -- it's MUCH MUCH MUCH cheaper. Fellas, if you hear a “POP” when your mate is riding you too rough AND you have severe pain in your penis, it probably broke i.e. fractured. Go to the ER ASAP.

  • How can you tell if you have an STD? +

    How can you tell if you have an STD?

    You can’t, and there lies the problem! Unless you have obvious genital warts or blisters from an outbreak of herpes, it probably won’t be obvious. If you have foul smelling vaginal discharge, lower belly pain, pain with urination, pain during sex, discharge from the penis, testicular pain, swollen testes, anal itching, itching or odor coming from your vagina or penis, or rashes (bumps, open sores, etc.), visit your doctor ASAP. If not, make sure to get tested regularly just to be safe.

  • Is having sex while pregnant dangerous for my baby? +

    Is having sex while pregnant dangerous for my baby?

    No honey, get your freak on! You shouldn’t have sex if you are at risk of preterm labor or an STI, or if you have vaginal bleeding, or have a previa (placenta is located at the cervical opening), your cervix is floppy, or your water breaks. Orgasms can make your uterus contract. Proceed with oral play using caution. Just make sure your mate doesn’t force air into the vagina -- air can enter your blood vessels and travel to your lungs which can be fatal for you and your baby.

  • How can I make my penis bigger? +

    How can I make my penis bigger?

    That's the million dollar question. You can make it longer if you go to the gym. Lose weight fellas, especially belly fat! You can also make it stronger by masturbating. No smoking, either -- as that can shrink the size of your penis.

  • How can I make my vagina tighter? +

    How can I make my vagina tighter?

    This big mystery has been solved! Purchase Ben-Wa Balls from your local adult store. Since the balls are weighted, you have to use your muscles in the vagina to hold them in. Buy the ones with the string attached to them. This way you can increase resistance by tugging on them. You can also work those muscles by having more orgasms -- and work Your Core! Pilates is great for this.

    Try Vagina Cones. They are a set of small cones, identical in shape and size, but of increasing weights. If you can keep a cone in the vagina for 15 minutes, you can use a heavier cone the next day. Finally, there’s always vaginoplasty -- this is a fancy word for reconstructive plastic surgery of the vagina. Of course, surgery should always be your last resort.

  • How to use lube if you have skin allergies? +

    How to use lube if you have skin allergies?

    If you are having burning, irritation, swelling, itching, or rashes "down there" when using a lube, you may have a skin allergy.

    Many lube users reach for Astroglide Natural or Astroglide Sensitive Skin Gel, which are specifically allergy-tested. Silicone-based lubes like Astroglide X Silicone Liquid or Astroglide Diamond Silicone Gel are also hypoallergenic, meaning they’re great for you ladies and fellas with sensitive skin. In fact, you should also try 100% silicone, glass, or metal toys, as there are no pores in them, which means bacteria can’t grow there (just be sure not to use silicone lube with silicone toys as they can degrade the material over time).

    In general, make sure the lube you pick is free of perfumes and coloring. Also check to see if you have an allergy to latex condoms, as this is very common. Likewise, tell your partner to back off the scented soaps, lotions and colognes, as they all can cause you to break out. It might be a good idea to make them shower before knocking the boots!

    View By Topic

    • All About Lube +-
    • How to Use Lube on Your Man +

      How to Use Lube on Your Man

      When it comes to pleasuring a man’s body, a couple of drops of Astroglide can be used on his penis, scrotum, perineum, anal opening, nipples… almost any part he wants sexually stimulated! Techniques employed often depend on the hot spot and just how much he can handle in being stroked, kneaded, rubbed, pinched, pulled, tickled, scratched, stretched, massaged…one way to approach touching him includes doing to him what you like having done to yourself and seeing how that goes. You can also ask him what he likes and what feels good, as every man is different in how he likes to be stimulated.

    • The Pocket +

      The Pocket

      One of the most versatile finger and tongue tricks designed to make her toes curl as you stroke the legs and bulbs of her clitoris. 

      • Start by lying at her side at hip height. 
      • Put a few drops of lube on all five fingers and place your palm flat against her Venus Mound. 
      • Bend your fingers down to press against the full width and length of her vulva so that you’re cupping it in your hand.
      • Slowly slide your fingers up and down increasing your speed as her arousal builds.

    • Cross My Fingers +

      Cross My Fingers

      The perfect technique to get her all riled up by stimulating her orgasmic platform, which includes the opening and outer third of her vagina.

      • Cross your index and middle fingers and slather them in lube.
      • Insert your crossed fingers with your palm facing down and rotate as you slide in and out.
      • Use her hip movements and breath rate as cues to find the perfect rhythm. 

       

    • The Sensual W +

      The Sensual W

      A simple warm-up move will get her juices flowing and increase blood flow to her hot spots. Since you’ll be stimulating her clitoris as you stroke, don’t be surprised if your sexy warm-up quickly turns into some full-fledged hip thrusting and deep moaning on her part.

      • Apply a generous amount of lube to one hand.
      • Place your wet palm against her vulva and form a W with all five fingers (keeping your thumb together with your index finger and your pinky together with your ring finger). 
      • Slowly slide “The W” downward as your squeeze your fingers together. Your middle finger can press down against her clitoris while the outer edges of the “W” gently squeeze her inner labia. 
      • Slide back up over her vulva and re-open your fingers to re-form the “W” as you approach the top again. 

       

      If you find that your “W” looks more like the letter “V” or a greeting from a popular space exploration show, fear not. She won’t know the difference! There is no right or wrong way to use these techniques — experiment, make changes and feel to rename them as you see fit.

       

    • The Cross My Heart +

      The Cross My Heart

      The technique can promote circulation, encourage lubrication and improve sexual response. But who cares about the health benefits, when it feels so darn good?

      • Press both thumbs (covered in lube) against the head of her clitoris at the top of her vulva.
      • Slowly trace your thumbs in a heart-shape around her vulva paying extra attention to the sensitive fourchette (the notch where her lips connect at the bottom).
      • When you reach the bottom, bring both thumbs back up the center to reach the top and repeat.

       

    • The Nose Job +

      The Nose Job

      Designed with both pleasure and intimacy in mind. Not only does the tip of your nose have a unique texture (go ahead and touch it very gently with your index finger), but the nose is an erogenous zone for many people. In fact, its inner lining can swell during sexual arousal just like the genitals and breasts. 

      • Put a drop or two of lube on the tip of your nose and gently run it between her lips.
      • Press it gently against the head of her clitoris or nod you head back and forth as you breathe deeply.
      • Use your hands to open up her labia and slide your lubed-up nose right inside of her as you tell her just how much you love it!

       

    • Two Tongues +

      Two Tongues

      Your lips and tongue can work wonders in the bedroom, but you have ten titillating fingers that can do so much more with the right amount of pressure and lube! Not only are your fingers more agile than your tongue, but they can be used to weave a sexy fantasy and reignite the spark:

      • Warm up your hands and place a few drops of lube to your fingertips.
      • Use your index and middle finger to “lick” all around his shaft alternating slow winding motions with quick short lines. 
      • Add another hand (index and middle finger or one big flat palm) to simulate two tongues.
      • As you “lick” away with your hands, tell him how good it feels and ask him if he’d like to have two lovers licking him into a frenzy.

      Playing with fantasies about threesomes or group sex can be unbelievable hot! This is a top sex fantasy for both men and women and many monogamous couples talk about these scenarios with no intention of living them out. However, it is important to talk to your partner about boundaries beforehand to make sure they’re comfortable with this type of erotic talk. Debriefing and offering reassurance (e.g. “In real life, you’re all I want! It’s just fun to fantasize and talk about threesomes”) is also essential to a happy relationship and sex life. 

      On the other hand, if you’re up for acting out threesomes and group sex, that’s perfectly okay too! You will, however, need to put considerable time and energy into preparing for your first experience to ensure that it is safe and pleasurable. 

    • The Firestarter +

      The Firestarter

      The perfect move to warm him up and give him a taste of what’s to come.

      • Cover your hands in lube and rub them together to create some heat.
      • Gently roll his shaft between your hands as though you’re warming him between your palms. 
      • Lick your lips and breathe warm air over his head to tease him into a frenzy.

       

    • The Goddess +

      The Goddess

      Thanks to the magic and special effects of porn, deep throating has been elevated to a level of fame and reverence beyond its true merits. Though deep pressure, suction and stroking are certainly desirable, they’re not the end-all be-all of a good blowjob. After all, your hands not only offer a tighter grip and greater flexibility, but with the right amount of lube and perfected technique, they should feel wetter and better than your mouth alone.

      • Warm your hands up in advance so that they reach a temperature similar to that of your mouth.
      • Interlace your fingers as you clasp both hands together and slather them in lube.
      • Attach your interlaced hands to your mouth so that they become one fluid unit.
      • Breathe heavily so that it feels as though you’re approaching him with your warm, wet mouth and slide your hands and mouth over his penis in one felt swoop. 
      • Lower your hands all the way to his base and then tighten your grip as you suck right back up to the top.
      • Stroke and suck up and down with your hands and mouth as one long, wet tunnel squeezing a little tighter each time you reach the very base.

    • The Stranger +

      The Stranger

      It is perfectly natural to be attracted to people other than your partner and fantasies are a natural extension of this attraction. The Stranger lets you play with new sensations to mimic the feeling of being touched by a brand new set of hands.

      • Get your hand nice and slippery with lube.
      • Use a backhand grip beginning in a thumbs-down position to grasp the base of his penis with all five fingers.
      • Stroke upward until your thumb and index finger reach the ridge and then lower all the way back down to the base.

       

    • The Like a Prayer +

      The Like a Prayer

      This will have him singing your praises for years to come!

      • Rub some lube between your palms to warm them up and place your hands in prayer position.
      • Once he’s hard, lower your hands over his cock beginning with the base of your palms and keeping your finger tips pointing upward toward his head.
      • Once you reach the base, open up your index and middle fingers before returning the tip and returning your hands back to prayer position.
      • Apply firm pressure as you stroke your hands up and down in prayer position.

    • Astroglide and Condom Use +

      Astroglide and Condom Use

      None of Astroglide’s lubricants are oil-based, so they won't weaken or break latex condoms. Check the labeling on packages to see if they specify to be Latex Safe or Condom Compatible. To enhance the feel of the condom apply a couple of drops of Astroglide to the inner and outer  surfaces.

    • How to Use Astroglide to Moisturize the Vagina +

      How to Use Astroglide to Moisturize the Vagina

      The easiest way to moisturize the vaginal walls would involve pouring some onto your fingers and then slipping your digits into your vagina. You would then want to use full-length strokes in covering your entire vaginal cavity with lube, trying to get an even coat on all sides of the wall.

      If easier, approach the endeavor like you would in applying facial moisturizer, using the same application strokes. Likewise, you could coat a wand-like sex toy, like a vibrator or dildo, with lube, to get a better reach.

    • Prolonging Sexual Intercourse +

      Prolonging Sexual Intercourse

      Using a lubricant like Astroglide can help some lovers have longer sex sessions in enabling the action to be more easily and pleasurably maintained, especially for women. A lube, however, is not a remedy for issues a male may have with performance, like erectile disorder or premature ejaculation (PE). For men with PE, the work needed to last longer actually begins with recommended “dry” masturbation sessions, where no lube is used until he can last longer with just the use of his hand.

    • For Her +-
    • The Pocket +

      The Pocket

      One of the most versatile finger and tongue tricks designed to make her toes curl as you stroke the legs and bulbs of her clitoris. 

      • Start by lying at her side at hip height. 
      • Put a few drops of lube on all five fingers and place your palm flat against her Venus Mound. 
      • Bend your fingers down to press against the full width and length of her vulva so that you’re cupping it in your hand.
      • Slowly slide your fingers up and down increasing your speed as her arousal builds.

    • Cross My Fingers +

      Cross My Fingers

      The perfect technique to get her all riled up by stimulating her orgasmic platform, which includes the opening and outer third of her vagina.

      • Cross your index and middle fingers and slather them in lube.
      • Insert your crossed fingers with your palm facing down and rotate as you slide in and out.
      • Use her hip movements and breath rate as cues to find the perfect rhythm. 

       

    • The Sensual W +

      The Sensual W

      A simple warm-up move will get her juices flowing and increase blood flow to her hot spots. Since you’ll be stimulating her clitoris as you stroke, don’t be surprised if your sexy warm-up quickly turns into some full-fledged hip thrusting and deep moaning on her part.

      • Apply a generous amount of lube to one hand.
      • Place your wet palm against her vulva and form a W with all five fingers (keeping your thumb together with your index finger and your pinky together with your ring finger). 
      • Slowly slide “The W” downward as your squeeze your fingers together. Your middle finger can press down against her clitoris while the outer edges of the “W” gently squeeze her inner labia. 
      • Slide back up over her vulva and re-open your fingers to re-form the “W” as you approach the top again. 

       

      If you find that your “W” looks more like the letter “V” or a greeting from a popular space exploration show, fear not. She won’t know the difference! There is no right or wrong way to use these techniques — experiment, make changes and feel to rename them as you see fit.

       

    • The Cross My Heart +

      The Cross My Heart

      The technique can promote circulation, encourage lubrication and improve sexual response. But who cares about the health benefits, when it feels so darn good?

      • Press both thumbs (covered in lube) against the head of her clitoris at the top of her vulva.
      • Slowly trace your thumbs in a heart-shape around her vulva paying extra attention to the sensitive fourchette (the notch where her lips connect at the bottom).
      • When you reach the bottom, bring both thumbs back up the center to reach the top and repeat.

       

    • The Nose Job +

      The Nose Job

      Designed with both pleasure and intimacy in mind. Not only does the tip of your nose have a unique texture (go ahead and touch it very gently with your index finger), but the nose is an erogenous zone for many people. In fact, its inner lining can swell during sexual arousal just like the genitals and breasts. 

      • Put a drop or two of lube on the tip of your nose and gently run it between her lips.
      • Press it gently against the head of her clitoris or nod you head back and forth as you breathe deeply.
      • Use your hands to open up her labia and slide your lubed-up nose right inside of her as you tell her just how much you love it!

       

    • For Him +-
    • Two Tongues +

      Two Tongues

      Your lips and tongue can work wonders in the bedroom, but you have ten titillating fingers that can do so much more with the right amount of pressure and lube! Not only are your fingers more agile than your tongue, but they can be used to weave a sexy fantasy and reignite the spark:

      • Warm up your hands and place a few drops of lube to your fingertips.
      • Use your index and middle finger to “lick” all around his shaft alternating slow winding motions with quick short lines. 
      • Add another hand (index and middle finger or one big flat palm) to simulate two tongues.
      • As you “lick” away with your hands, tell him how good it feels and ask him if he’d like to have two lovers licking him into a frenzy.

      Playing with fantasies about threesomes or group sex can be unbelievable hot! This is a top sex fantasy for both men and women and many monogamous couples talk about these scenarios with no intention of living them out. However, it is important to talk to your partner about boundaries beforehand to make sure they’re comfortable with this type of erotic talk. Debriefing and offering reassurance (e.g. “In real life, you’re all I want! It’s just fun to fantasize and talk about threesomes”) is also essential to a happy relationship and sex life. 

      On the other hand, if you’re up for acting out threesomes and group sex, that’s perfectly okay too! You will, however, need to put considerable time and energy into preparing for your first experience to ensure that it is safe and pleasurable. 

    • The Firestarter +

      The Firestarter

      The perfect move to warm him up and give him a taste of what’s to come.

      • Cover your hands in lube and rub them together to create some heat.
      • Gently roll his shaft between your hands as though you’re warming him between your palms. 
      • Lick your lips and breathe warm air over his head to tease him into a frenzy.

       

    • The Goddess +

      The Goddess

      Thanks to the magic and special effects of porn, deep throating has been elevated to a level of fame and reverence beyond its true merits. Though deep pressure, suction and stroking are certainly desirable, they’re not the end-all be-all of a good blowjob. After all, your hands not only offer a tighter grip and greater flexibility, but with the right amount of lube and perfected technique, they should feel wetter and better than your mouth alone.

      • Warm your hands up in advance so that they reach a temperature similar to that of your mouth.
      • Interlace your fingers as you clasp both hands together and slather them in lube.
      • Attach your interlaced hands to your mouth so that they become one fluid unit.
      • Breathe heavily so that it feels as though you’re approaching him with your warm, wet mouth and slide your hands and mouth over his penis in one felt swoop. 
      • Lower your hands all the way to his base and then tighten your grip as you suck right back up to the top.
      • Stroke and suck up and down with your hands and mouth as one long, wet tunnel squeezing a little tighter each time you reach the very base.

    • The Stranger +

      The Stranger

      It is perfectly natural to be attracted to people other than your partner and fantasies are a natural extension of this attraction. The Stranger lets you play with new sensations to mimic the feeling of being touched by a brand new set of hands.

      • Get your hand nice and slippery with lube.
      • Use a backhand grip beginning in a thumbs-down position to grasp the base of his penis with all five fingers.
      • Stroke upward until your thumb and index finger reach the ridge and then lower all the way back down to the base.

       

    • The Like a Prayer +

      The Like a Prayer

      This will have him singing your praises for years to come!

      • Rub some lube between your palms to warm them up and place your hands in prayer position.
      • Once he’s hard, lower your hands over his cock beginning with the base of your palms and keeping your finger tips pointing upward toward his head.
      • Once you reach the base, open up your index and middle fingers before returning the tip and returning your hands back to prayer position.
      • Apply firm pressure as you stroke your hands up and down in prayer position.

    • Love and Romance +-
    • The Questions You Should Be Asking for Safe Casual Sex +

      The Questions You Should Be Asking for Safe Casual Sex

      The two most important questions when it comes to sexual health are:

      1. Have you been tested for sexually transmitted infections, including HIV/AIDS?

      2. Do you consistently practice safe sex?

      In asking these questions, let your potential partner know that, while you enjoy getting frisky, you feel that it’s important to look after each other. When delivered in the right way, a responsible lover can be seen as sexy in being so empowered and willing to take care of him/herself and others. There’s something reassuring about an individual who is not going to take any risks. Of course, it helps to have a condom handy, in showing that you practice what you preach.

    • How To Increase Sexual Desire +

      How To Increase Sexual Desire

      For centuries, humans have been concocting and using a variety of foods, beverages, scents, homeopathic remedies, herbal formulas, drugs, vitamins, and gadgets that are thought to boost one's libido and improve sex. Collectively known as aphrodisiacs, a number of these sex potions are said to increase sexual desire, arousal, performance, and our attraction to others. Yet most of the supposed miraculous effects of aphrodisiacs are based on folklore, myths, and medieval medical theory - not scientific fact.

      With an aphrodisiac being basically anything you find alluring, consider what around you can be a turn on. This may be the suggestive shape of a piece of fruit or raw seafood, like oysters. It may be the way your body reacts to goodies like chocolate, coffee, or spicy chilies. Or it may be what something symbolizes, like peach juice dribbling down your chin.

      Basically, believing something will work becomes in and of itself a self-fulfilling prophecy – if you think that something is sexually arousing, then it is! This speaks to the fact that your biggest sex organ is your brain. It's ultimately the power of your mind that gets you turned on. So when it comes to getting yourself mentally aroused, consider some of the following strategies:

      • Giving yourself permission to take a break from everything going on in your life to get intimate.
      • Drawing a bubble bath or doing anything that relaxes you, as this helps to make you more receptive to sexual stimuli.
      • Asking your lover to woo you more, especially with words, e.g., planting erotic ideas to be realized later or telling each other sexy stories.
      • Remind yourself – and asking that you be reminded – that you are desired. This can be conveyed with sexy self-touch or affectionate gestures, like a slow and sensual kiss on your neck.

    • Using Lube for Sensual Massages +

      Using Lube for Sensual Massages

      It's smart to think about an all-purpose massage product since a number of lotions, oils, and other "potions" used for body massage should go nowhere near a woman's vulva or vagina. Astroglide X is great for genital massages and can be rubbed into other parts of the body for a more luxurious rub down when desired.

    • Spend Some Time Away From Each Other +

      Spend Some Time Away From Each Other

      It’s hard to miss what you have when you’re with him or her all of the time. While it can be nice and comforting to be inseparable, many couples swear by the occasional time apart, as this feeds their want for their partner in a new and refreshing way. So whether it’s an evening out with the gals, or a weekend of golf with the guys, give yourselves a breather from time to time. 

    • The In's and Out's of Sex +-
    • Sex During Her Period +

      Sex During Her Period

      While some couples have no problems having sex any time of the month, others are hesitant to have intercourse during the week of a woman’s period. Either way, don't make a big deal about it. Keep cool, calm, and collected. Don't get dramatic, like you're grossed out, or stop having sex, or make a big to do about clean up. She's a woman; these things happen. And both of you may find that you appreciate the benefits of sex during this time of the month, e.g., her orgasms can bring menstrual cramp relief.

    • What to Do When "It" is Too Big +

      What to Do When "It" is Too Big

      A gal’s best bet in handling a big penis during vaginal intercourse is to make sure she’s fully turned on. The two of you need to engage in plenty of foreplay, giving your body at least 20 minutes to become aroused. This allows the vaginal canal to lengthen, giving a longer penis more room (otherwise, it can bang up against the cervix, causing pain). If you’re not lubricating well or want things wetter, use some Astroglide lube as this will make any width issues more comfortable. Finally, practice Kegel exercises as toning your vaginal muscles will give you more control over the situation.

    • Best Sexual Position for Having an Orgasm +

      Best Sexual Position for Having an Orgasm

      The position depends on the kind of orgasm a woman is after. Rear entry, for example, is popular for tempting a vaginal orgasm since it effectively stimulates her G spot area. Woman-on-top, on the other hand, is known to be one of the best in providing clitoral stimulation (especially since she's in control) for clitoral orgasm. This is important to note since so many women do not reach climax during penetrative sex if it involves no more than thrusting.

      Make sure to engage in oral action (which many women will climax from first, only to have another one later). Keeping her hub of pleasure fired up with finger action or a vibrator during thrusting can also be critical in helping her to orgasm. Some women, too, have other erogenous zones on their body that could help them to reach the “Big O” when stimulated during thrusting, e.g., her nipples. The best way to find out what positions and types of stimulation are best is to simply ask the woman, since preferences vary widely.

    • How to Delay Ejaculation +

      How to Delay Ejaculation

      There are a number of numbing agents on the market that you could try, including condoms with numbing agents inside of them. However, many of these products can be problematic in that the principle component, typically lidocaine, is a numbing agent. This means that the male loses sensation in his attempt to last longer, which ends up compromising sexual satisfaction in other ways. The cream, gel or spray can also rub off on his partner, numbing that person as well. 

      As far as product recommendations, it would be best to talk to your doctor, as different experts have different opinions and warnings about what's effective and safe. A man's ability to last longer is often based on his level of sexual awareness and his ability to engage his pelvic floor muscles. Both of these matters can be dealt with in consulting a sex coach or counselor - no creams, gels or sprays required.

    • Helping Your Partner Explore Self-Pleasure +

      Helping Your Partner Explore Self-Pleasure

      Before you say or do anything, it's important to realize – and respect – that you can't make somebody do something that they don’t want to do. If a gal or guy isn't into something sexually speaking, then they’re not and hopefully they’ve made the best decision for themselves in opting out.

      However, you can suggest self-pleasuring as a means of sexual exploration, whether partnered or solo. In doing so, your idea is going to sound much more appealing if you point out the health benefits of masturbation, such as the fact that it's a great form of stress relief. There are the sexual benefits as well, like that it increases sexual awareness and can enhance your sex life with more intense orgasms.

      Self-pleasuring isn't for everyone, and that's okay. However, people may simply need to be enlightened about how this is a perfectly normal, natural means of sexual pleasuring and satisfaction. Information may just invite exploration.

    • Maximizing Sexual Excitement +

      Maximizing Sexual Excitement

      Sure, stimulating a hot spot, or engaging in a certain type of foreplay, or assuming a sexy position can all increase one’s arousal. But there are other factors that lovers often overlook in getting turned on, specifically: the ability to not worry nor have a sense of burden; having a certain degree of selfishness, as in making it okay to satiate your own needs; and feeling a certain degree of autonomy in your relationship. 

    • Ignore the Queef +

      Ignore the Queef

      Nothing can kill the mood quite like “PBLTT!!” More technically known as a "vaginal fart" or "vaginal flatulence," that not so sexy sound is simply the expulsion of air out of the vagina during thrusting. Recommendations for minimizing its occurrence are to avoid deeper thrusting positions, e.g., rear entry, to avoid changing positions/withdrawing, and to stick with slow vs. fast thrusting. If and when it happens, just pretend that you didn’t hear a thing or allow yourselves to laugh – then get back to business!

    • Keeping the Lights On or Off During Sex +

      Keeping the Lights On or Off During Sex

      This is very individual. Lights on or off boils down to body comfort and what the mood calls for. Lights out can have people totally uninhibited and comfortable, allowing fantasies to run wild because of what can't be seen. Lights on can definitely fully engage the fact that both men and women are very visual creatures, while a burning candle or similar softer lighting effect can engage lovers with its intrigue, romance, sensualism... So I say change it up! 

    • Sexual Wellness Advice +-
    • Helping Her Achieving Orgasm +

      Helping Her Achieving Orgasm

      Not achieving orgasm might be what is normal for her, but that’s not to say she can never have an orgasm. Some key ways for her to invite orgasm include:

      1. Getting out of her head. She needs to let go of what’s going on in her head and submerge herself in what her body is experiencing. People will often shut down their sexual response with performance anxiety, worrying about the situation, or what their partner is thinking.
      2. Engaging in plenty of foreplay, as in at least 20 minutes. Both of you should be taking your time, taking caution not to make orgasm a goal.
      3. Never mentioning the term “achieve orgasm,” as this puts a lot of pressure on yourselves and suppresses sexual excitement.
      4. Thinking about sex and her body as something beautiful and not dirty. If she has negative issues with either, then she may want to talk to a counselor about such blocks.
      5. Masturbating. She needs to privately discover what turns her on, experimenting with different enhancements, like a vibrator, and erotica. The two of you can also explore such together.
      6. Getting more stimulation, focusing on the clitoris. This is where a vibrator comes in handy!
      7. Strengthening her pelvic floor muscles with Kegel exercises.
      8. Communicating with her partner.
      9. Ensuring she’s comfortable with the sexual situation, e.g., there’s plenty of privacy.

    • Vaginal Dryness & Pain During Sex +

      Vaginal Dryness & Pain During Sex

      Dyspareunia, the experience of sudden cramping, burning sensations, discomfort and sharp pains during sex, is a painful condition that can occur in men or women for a number of reasons. It has nothing to do with a female’s size, and could be due to vaginal dryness, and/or other causes such as that the thrusting is too fast-paced, or because you being in an awkward position makes for uncomfortable penetration, or you may have a urinary tract infection, STD, or other condition. In getting to the bottom of the cause, be sure to get checked out by your gynecologist. He or she will not only examine you for any medical problems, but may inquire about any products you use, like feminine hygiene products, contraceptives, or clothing that could be contributing to the pain.

      A great starting point for dealing with the vaginal dryness is to use a lubricant like Astroglide during sex play, making sure to engage in at least 20 minutes of foreplay in order to maximize sexual arousal. With increased sexual excitement, you may experience more natural lubrication, plus give your vaginal canal time to elongate comfortably to accommodate his penis (as pain is sometimes caused by the tip of the penis banging up against the cervix).

    • Maintain a Sex Life in Spite of Becoming Parents +

      Maintain a Sex Life in Spite of Becoming Parents

      Sex therapists will tell you that most couples they see can trace the demise of their sexual relationship to the birth of their first child. Luckly,there are buffers to such a situation, including:

      - effective problem-solving skills
      - level of commitment
      - partners’ readiness to have the child
      - levels of trust
      - perceived availability of partner support

      The more you’re on the same page with these matters, and the more you’re able to communicate with each other about these issues, the better off your union and, ultimately, your sex life will be. 

       

    • Difficulty Realizing an Erection +

      Difficulty Realizing an Erection

      It is perfectly normal – and quite common – for a man to experience changes to his erectile functioning with age, especially if he’s grappling with any health issues or taking certain medications. Other factors that can impact his ability to have an erection include: smoking, alcohol, stress, performance anxiety, relationship difficulties. Some of these may be temporary issues, while others can be long-term.

      If you’re finding yourself dealing with erectile dysfunction (ED) on a regular basis, your best starting point is to talk to your doctor about your health and the medications you’re on. Your physician should also screen you for any other health or lifestyle issues that may be affecting your ability to get hard. The two of you will then want to strategize on the best and most appropriate treatment, whether that would involve a drug for ED: like Viagra, a vacuum device, penile prosthetic implants, or other modes of therapy.

      Dealing with the issues at hand can be made even easier in working with a certified sex therapist or counselor, especially since erectile dysfunction can take a toll on one’s emotional health or relationship. This professional can also guide you and your partner around matters of sexual satisfaction and aging. Our sexual pleasuring and responses do evolve as we get older, but that doesn’t necessarily have to mean for the worse.

    • Vaginal Dryness After a Hysterectomy +

      Vaginal Dryness After a Hysterectomy

      Vaginal dryness can be a problem for some women who have undergone a hysterectomy, so know that you’re not alone! In tackling vaginal dryness, the best and most important thing you can do is to talk to your gynecologist about the symptoms that you’re experiencing. In determining the cause (beyond having had a hysterectomy), your doctor may test your hormone levels. If needed, your doctor may prescribe hormone supplements or an estrogen cream, or explore alternative therapies and vaginal moisturizers with you.

      No matter what, use an Astroglide lubricant when sexually active, as this will diminish pain and discomfort, making things more pleasurable. Take your time when making love, allowing your body to get as turned on as possible. 

      Also, take the time to condition your vulva and vaginal walls, as in perform a regular massage, with your hands, a dildo, or vibrator, and lube, to gently stretch and strengthen your skin. You want to press and release the fluid into your skin (versus rub or stroke it). Over time, this will condition your skin, helping to increase blood flow, flexibility and tissue resiliency.

    • Reclaim Intimacy Post-Pregnancy +

      Reclaim Intimacy Post-Pregnancy

      First, have time and privacy guaranteed. This may require lining up childcare and treating yourselves to a couple of hours at a motel. The baby's welfare is going to be a huge distraction and many moms will feel guilty for not making themselves 100% available in attending to their little one. So take care of issues related to that first. 

      Second, have plenty of Astroglide lube handy, as well as birth control figured out. The former is critical if you're breastfeeding. The latter is a must if you don't want another bundle of joy in 9 months (you can conceive within just a couple of weeks of giving birth). 

      Finally, don't put pressure on yourself to necessarily be having all types of sex or assume all sorts of positions. Go in with an open mind, but with compassion for your physique and where you're at mentally and emotionally.

    • Taking Control of Your Sex Fears +

      Taking Control of Your Sex Fears

      Sex hang-ups can hold us back from reaching our full sexual potential, and enjoying the best sex of our lives. So commit to taking on whatever is hijacking your sex life, first by becoming informed. Read as much as you can about your issue, whether it’s lack of confidence, performance fears, body image concerns, or something else, gather information on what’s going on and how you can change the situation. Information is power. Second, recruit professional help in overcoming the issue. Depending on your needs, this may involve working with a sex coach or educator, or with a certified sex counselor or therapist . Life’s too short to not realize the sex life of your dreams!

    • Arousal, Sensitivity & Orgasms After a Hysterectomy +

      Arousal, Sensitivity & Orgasms After a Hysterectomy

      It’s natural for the body to respond differently post-surgery, with some women who have undergone a hysterectomy experiencing a loss of sexual response. Those who had typically experienced more internal orgasms versus externally stimulated ones can find it especially hard to reclaim physical sensations.In eliciting more of a physical response during sexual activity, apply a hot water bottle to your vulva about 5-10 minutes before sex play. This will stimulate greater blood flow to the genital area for increased responsiveness. 

      Continue using a lubricant like Astroglide, as this can be helpful in further enhancing any strategies. If you’ve found that your feelings about sexual intimacy have changed, and you want to get back to your old sexual self, seek out a support group or talk to a therapist about any emotional issues that could be further shutting down your sexual response. While going through a hysterectomy is an extremely difficult situation, more than anything, try to see this as an opportunity to further explore and redefine your sexuality, keeping in mind that your brain is your most important sex organ.

    • Having Trouble Ejaculating +

      Having Trouble Ejaculating

      When a guy doesn’t ejaculate during sex, especially when he’s been going at it for a while, he may be experiencing “retrograde ejaculation,” a condition where the bladder’s sphincter doesn’t close off properly during emission. So the semen ends up getting emptied into his bladder. This “dry cum” situation can be due to physical reasons, like diabetes, hypertension or prostate or urethral surgery. Men can also experience it during Tantric sex.

      In making sure that your body’s response is not a symptom of a larger problem, be sure to consult with your physician about the situation. If your doctor can rule out any physical problems at play, you may want to consult with a sex counselor or therapist on any personal issues involved. No matter what, don’t let “finishing” define your performance or the quality of the sex you’re having. “Cumming” shouldn’t be the goal and the only mark of a great sexual experience because it is also about the intimacy it creates for your partner and the enjoyment of the “ride!”