Do you find yourself in the mood for sex, but at a loss as to how to seduce your partner? Has your sexual routine become predictable? Are you looking to spice things up? Do you long for the tension that precedes the main event, but don’t know how to cultivate it?
We’re here to help with some saucy strategies for initiating sex that are simple, creative and will leave you both aching for more, more, more!
1. Talk dirty. Dirty talk may the most powerful tool any skilled lover can wield, but don’t wait until you’re in the bedroom to show your saucy side. Flirt while you’re getting ready for work. Compliment your partner over breakfast. Whisper in their ear when you get home (the kids can’t hear hushed tones!). Tease them while you’re both winding down watching TV. Since each and every one of us craves the feeling of being desired, try some of these lines to seduce your partner throughout the day:
“I can’t stop thinking about you.”
“You looked so hot in those shorts/shirt/shoes…”
“I’m going to take care of you tonight.”
“I’m aching for you.”
“I got worked up in a meeting because I was thinking about last night/week.”
2. Send a sext. Sex and technology form the perfect pair to enhance your love life, so pepper your day/week with flirtatious messages and pics that leave plenty to the imagination.
3. Give a facial massage. Back massages are perfect for relaxation and working out tense muscles, but a facial massage is intimate and erotic and sets the tone for passionate kissing and more! Use the backs of your fingers, feather-light touch and the slowest pace possible to awaken new nerve endings and pathways to pleasure.
4. Share your dreams. Tell your partner about a sexy dream you’ve had -- and feel free to embellish and fill in the gaps as you see fit.
5. Leave your toys out! Leaving vibrators, handcuffs, blindfolds or free lube sample on the bedside table can signal your interest in sex and shift your partner’s thoughts to sex even when you’re both busy and preoccupied.
6. Touch yourself. Get the sex session started before your partner comes to bed so that you’re all riled up and ready to focus on their pleasure once they hit the sheets.
7. Surprise your partner! Sneak up from behind while he’s doing the dishes or ply her with kisses while she’s reading on the couch. The element of surprise is essential to keeping the spark alive, so brush your hand gently against the nape of her neck, prolong your gaze toward his crotch while you bite your lip or flash your lover playfully when they least expect it.
8. Order an adult movie. The sights, sounds and inspiration of erotic film are enough to put even the most distracted of minds in the mood for some good lovin’ and porn has come a long way to meet a wide range of interests. Check out more info on ethical porn here!
9. Be demanding. You don’t have to be creative or suave to initiate sex. Simply ask for what you want:
“I want you to take care of me.”
“I want to be ravaged.”
“What would it take to get you to the bedroom?”
“I want you down on your knees.”
“Can you take me upstairs and hold me down?”
10. Offer “full service”. Dim the lights or light candles. Blindfold your lover. Offer a slow, sensuous massage while admiring their body. Encourage them to relish in the pleasure while breathing deeply. Run your fingers, breath, tongue and lips over every inch of their body before working your way between their legs. Keep things nice and slow!
Remind them that they don’t have to move a muscle or reciprocate. Use your fingertips to warm up some lube while you tease it over their hot spots. Let their hips pump and gyrate while you build their desire slowly and intensely as though they’ve paid for the “full service.”
Not sure which of these tips to test first? Why not try thinking of which would turn YOU on the most, then try it on your partner! And if you need a little extra advice on how to set the mood, you can always tweet @SexWithDrJess and @ASTROGLIDE for some bonus tips. Seducing your partner isn’t always easy -- but we’re in your corner and happy to help!
Images are for illustrative purposes only.